Today is my mom's birthday. I asked why everyone blew out the candles and she said cos she didn't want to get out of breath.

Watching the new 'Spartacus' on Syfy with moms: He's not good looking, Ohma. His nose is too hooky. You know who's good looking? Captain America. O yeah... And you know who else? Dthawn. I think he from down and under.
Me: Who?
Moms: Dthawn... With the hammer.

(Go back and re-read 'Dthawn' so it sounds like a bell ringing.)


June 26

Sunday 05/18/14 Addition

Me: I better go, mom. I have laundry to finish.

Mom: You should do your laundry on Friday when you get home from work. Then on Saturday clean house, do you shopping, get thing done. Then on Sunday, you can relax and just let everything hang. But, I know you always busy, Ohma... You have too many friend. I have no friend. I get a lot of shit done.

On Friday, I had dinner with Robin at Sushi Yamaguchi. I had my very favorite... Unagi in a box.

Mom: Are you taking chicken?

Me: Yeah, I have some.

Mom: Don't you want the chicken tit?

Me: Uh... sure, I'll take the chicken tit.

Tip for "the girl" (my niece) who is having trouble in math:
Master the money! Knowing how to make change, tip, shop, and pay tax teaches you how to add, subtract, multiply, divide, learn fractions, percentage, and even basic algebra.

Dinner with my mom is always a joy. She cooks divinely, is always a font of wisdom, and usually of humor.

There are always staples at a dinner with mom... rice (no Asian culture goes without), papaya salad (Som Tum), spiciest item on the menu, Chicken Salad (Larb Gai), a meat (tonight was grill fried chicken), and vegetables.

The best times, though, are when my niece, nephew, and sister come over as well and we can spend it together. We talk, we laugh, we catch up with each others' lives, we enjoy one anothers' company... and in our own way, we celebrate one another... this small, pretty, close-knit family of ours.

Aren't they wonderful?

We discussed Cliven Bundy, equal pay for equal work, political correctness, migrant workers / illegal aliens, and religion. Nephew is an an atheist, btw... I'm proud, but I did warn him against tearing those down that were religious.... not all people with religion practice it equally, so no dumping on all for one persons' hypocrisy.

The largest (or rather heated) discussion was that of equal pay. We spent nearly 20 minutes trying to clarify that we weren't talking about the physicality between men and women (a whole other topic) but that men and women who actually do the same job should be paid equally.

As I was leaving for the night and saying good-bye to my mum, I was a little disappointed that since most of the time was spent with the family, I was unable to tease out something for a funny post from my mom. She said, "It's okay, Ohma. I'll say something funny next week." Then I remembered her reaction to a photo that my friend, Sam, had posted to her Facebook feed. It's of a puppy she rescued called Mr. Twix. Upon seeing this adorable dog, my mom, who claims to hate all 4 of her own animals, squealed in glee and clapped her hands in seal-like joy. She wants to meet Mr. Twix, although she does "hate" him and his ridiculously long lashes. I think the ear to ear grin she had on her face betrayed the "hate".

I spend my Thursdays with my mom. Nothing is ever planned on a Thursday and the only way I will ever not spend it with her is if she cancels or she says come Wednesday, instead. Every time I visit with my mom she feeds me (which is awesome!). And she usually gives me something worth tweeting or facebooking about. Here are this Thursday's stories. I'll start posting all her older ones.

Mom story #1

Eels

I won't eat eel, Ohma. When I was a little girl I was out looking for some food. In Thailand, there no foodstamps... you have to go get you food. Two men were fishing with a net, you know, one push the fish to the other and they catch in net and empty it out. The man pushing fish he grab eel... Electric eel, Ohma! He (bzzz bzzz bzzz) I feel so bad, Ohma... I cry.

Did he die?

No, but I never eat eel. I don't like anything like that. No snake either.

Photo: An Electric Eel at the California Academy of Sciences.
Date 13 September 2013 Steven Walling http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Electric_eel_CAS.jpg

Mom story #2

Frogs

I don't eat frogs either, Ohma. You know why? 'Cause when you kill them you have to hit them in the head. When you hit them, Ohma, they screeeeam... like a little kid. My mom, she kill those frogs, Ohma, and I cry, and cry. I'm just a little girl, like 4 and my mom, she bonk me on the head and ask me why I cry. I say "Don't you feel sorry for them?" She say, "No, I'm hungry."

My mom make me go get frog from market, and they wrap a string around the stomach and you carry it home that way, like a purse, Ohma. I drop it with my mom and then I go away. I never eat it, Ohma.

But one day, I decided I was going to eat one. So I went to the market and carried frog home and I hit it, Ohma. It scream and scream. You know what happen? I let it go. Haha.

When I have to go get fish my mom say, "Buy the live one."

I make the market kill it so I don't have to watch my mom do it at home or I never eat, Ohma, never. Good thing I never watch cow or pig killed. I be little tiny skinny thing.

Photo: Kob Thanin Market
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Kob_Thanin_Market.jpg